Kindheit des ehemaligen Skinheads und Rassisten Arno Michaelis

„My Life After Hate“ heißt die Autobiografie (erschienen 2010: La Prensa de LAH, Milwaukee) des ehemaligen Skinheads und Rassisten Arno Michaelis. Er schreibt nicht viel über seine Kindheit. Das, was er schreibt, ist allerdings überdeutlich und spricht für sich selbst. Ganz „klassisch“ ist hier auch, wie er seine Kindheitserfahrungen in ihrer Wirkung für sein Leben ausklammert bzw. relativiert und im selben Part über Schilderungen über seine Kindheit (z.B. eine dysfunktionale Familie und Alkoholismus des Vaters) anhängt, er wäre sehr von seinen Eltern geliebt worden:  

„Yeah, there were issues at home; dysfunction that paled in comparison to the billions of people on this planet with real problems that was nevertheless catastrophic to me. But looking back I don’t see any valid excuse for how fucked-up I turned out.
In the movies I would have been physically beaten by parents and/or ghetto thugs while clawing out survival from an impoverished hovel, like many of my comrades were to one degree or another. But in real life I grew up in a nice house in a nice neighborhood and never went hungry or took a beating. My parents loved me dearly, but that made my dad’s drinking and their subsequent fighting a constant hurt that drove me to lash out, denying their love for me and filling that void with hate.
In the absence of love’s light, hate can be exciting, seductive. It beckons you and sends torrid, empty power coursing through your veins. At first you think you can dabble. Just for kicks. Just a bit of entertainment to ripple the excruciating monotony of your disdain for the world. You blink, and you’re covered in someone’s blood. Another blink and the doors of your cell are slamming shut“ (S. 29).

Für das „Forgiveness Project“ hat er auch online etwas über seine Kindheit geschrieben:
„I grew up in an alcoholic household where emotional violence was the norm and as a kid who was told I could achieve anything, I reacted to that emotional violence by lashing out and hurting people. I started out as the bully on the school bus, and by the time I was in middle school I was committing serious acts of vandalism.
As a teenager I got into the punk rock scene which for a while was the ultimate outlet for my aggression. But, like any other addiction, my thrill seeking needed constant cranking up, so when I encountered racist skinheads I knew I’d found something far more effective. I joined up for the kicks and to make people angry.“